There's only so much emotion words can describe. Yet despite -all- that's happened, the betrayal,the fleeing, the scary ass fucking shaman, the explosions, the fighting...everything, I just feel shock. I'm a criminal. -We are all criminals.- But....how? I don't understand? What did we do? Alright I guess I feel confusion as well. And some pain.
Our escape was such a blur. I just remembered that I used every explosion on me and all my knives are gone. And I can hold a lot. And Jaen.....of all of us he remained the least unscathed. I can't even describe my relief. But most of all, during the fight, I just sort of...didn't worry about him. I just knew he would be OK. Well to be honest I thought we were all equally screwed so that fact that he came out of it with barely a scratch is just a perk. Illy....Illy is unaccounted for amongst others. Did they even give her a chance to run before they shot her? No she's not dead but I prepare myself for the worst for a reason.
My monocle is broken. Thankfully I made the right choice when I rented some space in Booty Bay. I thought to myself. I'm fucking rich, why not build places all over the map. But renting is far better. The goblins take care of the space for me. Keep thieves away. But my glass tools and extra lenses are at home. I can't see shit right now. It's making me dizzy. I hope I'm not squinting too much.
I haven't told anyone why I wear it. I don't even know if Jaen is really sure why I wear it all the time. Believe me it's not that cool looking. It does have a couple bells and whistles but it also corrects my vision. Since my that shrapnel bomb nearly took me out all those months ago that eye has never been the same. The goblins couldn't get all of it. I guess I should be lucky with what I do have still working. I think maybe that was the main reason I couldn't be a hunter anymore. Yes, I tell people I just prefer to see my victims up close but well. What sort of hunter can't see far away?
Why can't they stop bickering? I can hear them now, trying to one up each other and out insult each other. Can't they realize the Vanguard is all we can trust now. We finally have a reason to man up and stick together, maybe start respecting one another. But no. The shots come. I don't know what I was expecting, for some fucking miracle that maybe they would open their eyes. I need to learn to stop expecting so much from them. Clearly I can only rely on Jaen but I will make the best of a bad situation.
We are alive...for now. Now it's time to find out what the fuck is going on.
